4 Ways to Resolve Caregiver-Employer Conflict

Evan enjoys working as Joseph’s caregiver. The pair gets along well and goes out on frequent excursions. In fact, Evan has few complaints — except for Joseph’s family. He knows they care deeply about their loved one’s well-being, but their demands are starting to weigh down on him.

It’s important for independent caregivers to discuss job expectations with their employer. Written guidelines and a detailed conversation will ensure the patient is cared for in a way that both parties find reasonable.

Job expectations are meant to minimize conflict. However, there’s no proven way to eliminate conflict altogether. From time to time, caregivers and families simply have different expectations. Or, in some cases, families are so worried about the patient’s health that the job description evolves into an entirely new role for the caregiver.

Nurse2Help, our free app that connects families with prescreened, private nurses in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia, has compiled a list of conflict resolution tips to strengthen the employer-employee relationship.

  1. Sit down for a conversation with your employer.

Perhaps the patient’s family is upset about the meals you are making, the outings you are facilitating, or the medical care you are providing. If there is a disconnect in any of these areas, sit down with your employer and revisit your job description. Both parties have a right to share their feelings, and friendly conversations are much more productive than accusations and reprimanding. Your role might change over time, but you should be involved in the process.

  1. Be empathetic. Voice your opinions without being defensive.

Say the person in your care has Alzheimer’s disease. If their memory is worsening, their family might say you aren’t doing enough to engage him or her. In response, consider telling your employer that while you understand where they’re coming from, you and the patient are spending the allotted 90 minutes per shift on stimulating memory-care activities. You might say that you would be happy to spend extra time on these activities, or suggest further treatment options.

Make sure to say your piece in a gentle, understanding way. Empathize with the patient’s family.

  1. Say “no” — and offer an alternative.

If your employer asks you to do something completely unrelated to your caregiving position, you are under no obligation to perform the task. In these cases, the employer is typically oblivious rather than consciously trying to take advantage of you. For example, if the patient’s sister asks you to wash her car when she stops by for a visit, tell her, “Unfortunately, that’s outside the scope of my caregiving position. I know a great place nearby you can go to, though.”

  1. Get to the root of the issue.

Recurring conflict over trivial things — like the way you make the patient’s bed, for instance — is often the sign of a greater issue. If you notice your employer fretting over small details, chat about how they’re feeling and ask them what you can do to improve. Often, informal conversations will help you and your employer identify what’s really the matter. Patients’ families often blame the caregiver for their loved one’s declining health, when the natural aging process is the real culprit.